Journey Of The Heart
by StrongMedFan
Summary: A girl goes in search of her birth mother...
1. Default Chapter

Erin got up at midnight from her bed, went into her closet, took out her duffle bag and started packing for Philadelphia. She learned that she was adopted when she was ten and started counting down the days until she was 18 to find her mother. Erin had her real mom's phone number and the place where her mom worked. Erin unzipped the bag and stuffed clothes and then zipped it back up. Then she got her backpack, put her CD player and CDs and then walked silently into her parent's bedroom, got her mom's wallet and took 500 dollars. Then she took the credit card from her mom's purse and went online and bought her train to Philly. She stuck the credit card into her wallet along with the 500 dollars, printed her ticket out on her printer and left. She hoisted her duffle bag onto her arm and left a note on her parent's dresser. She walked outside into the crisp cool New York City night to go to Grand Central Station. She hailed for a cab on Park Ave. and it sped away leaving a dust of smoke behind the apartment where she once lived. "Grand Central Station please", she said to the cab driver. "Alright you got it", he replied back.

As the cab driver pulled up to the corner of the train station, she whipped out a hundred from her wallet and told him to keep the change as she got her duffle bag that was sitting next to her. She walked into the station, took out her train ticket and went up to the counter. "Hi I'm Erin Shreves and I have a 2am train to Philly where do I go"? She asked the info desk clerk. "Just sit in anyone of those seats and we'll call you". Erin took her arms away from the desk and said: "Okay thank you", she walked away and sat on the bench next to the clerk's desk.


	2. Chapter 2

Erin sat patiently as she waited for the announcer to call her bus number. "Bus 28 leaving for Philadelphia is now boarding", the announcer said. _Okay this is my one and only chance I have to meet my birth mother, it's now or never._ She thought as she gathered her belongings as she headed for the bus platform.Erin walked to the bus and handed the man her ticket as he ripped it she got on and he handed her the stub. She settled into her seat as she put her bags down on the seat next to her. The train sped away like it was racing down the race track for a very long journey. Erin wondered what it would be like to meet her birth mother for the very first time. She knew that her mom was Latino and had a degree in medicine; she also wondered what her mom knew about her. All of Erin's life she knew she was different from her parents and from her siblings she never questioned that until a few years ago when someone asked her why she didn't look like her parents. She didn't have an answer for them then but she does now.

As the train came to her stop in Philadelphia she nervously got up from her seat and took her bags with her. She stepped off the train with both of her feet and walked away from the platform and into the station. _Wow, I'm finally here_, she thought to herself as she looked around the unfamiliar place and the people that wandered aimlessly through the station as if they were looking for something. Erin walked outside and found herself standing on the curb waving down a cab at 8am in the morning. "RittenHouse Women's Clinic please", she told the cab driver who sped away. The cab passed through the roughest part of town where druggies and prostitutes hang out. She saw a man giving money to a woman whom she guesses that slept with him the night before. _My goodness that is so disgusting,_ she thought. The cab driver pulled up to a nice pristine hospital that was very well lit and clean. "Fifty bucks ma'am", the cabbie said. She got out of the car and rustled out her wallet and handed him a 50 dollar bill. "Thanks ma'am, I hope you find what you are looking for", he said as he pulled away from the curb. _Me to_, she thought as she hoisted her duffle bag upon her arm and her backpack on her back. She walked the stairs into the building and found a bustling E.R full of patients and doctors.

Erin walked up to the receptionist desk and said: "Hi, my name is Erin Shreves and I have an appointment to see Lu Delgado", Lana the receptionist looked at this girl with a curiosity face and phoned Lu from her office. "Lu you have a patient that looks to be about 15 years old and looks exactly like you", Lana said into the receiver. "What? Okay", Lu said and hung up the phone. "She will be with you in a few, just have a seat over there", Lana pointed to a group of chairs that seemed to be unoccupied. Erin walked over and sat in the middle of the chairs. Erin put her bag on her lap and noticed a woman who opened the door of an office stepped out and walked over to the desk. _Holy shit I don't know if I can do this. What the fuck am I doing here,_ Erin thought to her. She never thought that this day would come.


	3. Chapter 3

Erin saw Lu Delgado walking towards her with her big white coat on. "You must be Erin", Lu said as she looked at Erin who was still sitting down. "Yes I am Erin", she said as she stood up to meet Lu's gaze. "Did you want to talk to me about something", Lu said as she noticed Erin's bags in hand. "Yes, I'm baby girl Delgado born on May 15th 1986", Erin said as she tried hard to compose her thoughts. Lu was in complete shock she never thought that one day that she would come face to face with her daughter whom she given up for adoption 18 years ago. "What did you come here for", Lu asked hoping she didn't scare Erin. "I'm 18 years old now so I looked you up online and I left home last night to come and find you. You are my biological mother Lu, I want to get to know you", Erin said as tears ran down her eyes. "Oh my gosh Erin", Lu said as she embraced her and held her. "I'm glad you came I really am. All my life I wondered about you how you turned out. Every birthday I had written you a card but I never sent it in fear that your adoptive parents might throw it away", Lu said as she continued to hold Erin in her arms. Erin put her head on Lu's chest. "I love you Lu I really do". Lu kissed the top of Erin's head and said "I love you to baby". Just then Dr. Campbell came walking down the corridor in long strides looking for Lu. Andy walked over to Lana and said "What's going on"? As Andy motioned her head in Lu's direction. "A little family reunion. That is Lu's daughter whom she gave up for adoption 18 years ago", Lana said as both Andy and her watched Erin and Lu talk. "Oh okay so I guess this is a bad time to have Lu look over this chart for me", Andy said as she closed the folder in her hand and placed it on the desk for Lana to take. "Yeah, come back later", Lana said. "Let's go to my office and talk", Lu said to Erin. "Alright sure", Erin replied. Lu and Erin got up from their seats and started to walk over to her office. "Lana hold my calls please", she said as she looked at Lana who was sitting behind her desk. "Okay what if it's your son Marc", Lana asked but then regretted it. "Tell him I'll call him back", Lu replied... Erin looked at Lu and said: "I have a brother". "Yes he is 17 years old I had him after you went to your adoptive parents", Lu explained as she saw tears coming out of Erin's eyes. Erin walked inside Lu's office and sat down in a plush red chair. "Why did you keep him and not me what was so wrong with me"? Erin asked. Lu walked over to her desk and sat in her chair. "Nothing was wrong with you, I couldn't have taken care of you like I wanted and my parents were pretty pissed as it was. I kept Marc because I didn't want to lose another child, I did not want to go through the pain of it", she said as she put her hands on the desk. "Oh I see so I was just another bad mistake that you made in your life", Erin said as she tried to catch her breath. "You were never a mistake Erin, never. I loved you from the day were you born until the day you left".Erin, looked at Lu straight in the fact and said: "Until the day I left? So meaning that you don't love me now"? Erin felt her hand start to tremble so she made a fist. "I still love you Erin, that was a bad choice of words on my part", Lu said as she turned off her beeper because it beeped. "Well duh. You know I never asked to be born, I've never asked to be put up for adoption, but unfortunately I was. I'm sorry I had taken up your time today when you obviously had more important things to do", Erin said as she picked up her bags and made her way for the door.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Erin was making her way through the Rittenhouse Hospital and Lu was running after her. "Erin wait"! Lu yelled as she stopped running. Erin turned around, to see Lu standing next to the secretary's desk. "What"? Erin said sarcastically. "I'm really sorry I said all of those things to you I really didn't mean it. I'm just so shocked to see you".

"Likewise. I'm shocked to see you as well. I've never thought that this day will come and here we are standing in the middle of a hospital", Erin said as she dropped her bag next to her. "I believe, you should come and stay with me for a few days and see how I live and we could catch up on lost time", Lu said holding out her arms for Erin to hug her. Erin ran to Lu and just hugged her without saying anything. "It's just so good to see you", Lu said as her beeper went off. "I guess I'll wait in your office for you while you tend to your patients who probably feel neglected by now", Erin said with laughter.

"Ok, it's probably a pregnant woman anyways. Have a seat in my office while I go check in on them", Lu said as she left. Erin walked into Lu's office again and sat in her seat with the computer right in front of her. She turned it on and waited for it to boot up. She got on her AOL mail and decided to email her best friend Brie.

_Dear Brie- Man, this feels so surreal like it feels like something out of a movie. I'm here in Philadelphia in my biological mother's Doctor's office. Yes she is a doctor of medical science not a shrink lol. Thankfully she didn't turn me away as I thought she would. She seemed to be open minded about me being here. Anyways I better sign off for now she probably might get mad at me if she knew I was using her computer. Ahhh what the hell I don't care. Luv always, Erin. _


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

Erin looked out the window of Lu's office, and saw a young pregnant woman sitting in a chair waiting to see a doctor. _I wonder what went through Lu's mind when she first knew about me_, she thought as she kept staring at the woman who looked like she was about to pop open. _Alright stop looking Erin,_ she thought to herself as she turned on the computer again and was surfing on Erin logged in with her name, and went onto the member's side of the forum, and was reading the message board and decided to post a message for her friends to see. "Hey all its me Erin. I made it to Philadelphia and I'm sitting inside my biological mother's doctor's office. It's hard to imagine that she didn't turn me away as I thought she would but yet she accepted me with open arms and I did the same thing cause that's what I wanted to do. Well I will post more later and I'll check back to see if anyone replies. I love you all. Erin", she hit the post button and signed off As the day grew to an end, Lu finally came back to her office. "Oh, I had no idea if it was alright to use your computer so I went ahead and used it anyway", Erin said as she stood up to meet Lu. " It's fine just as long as you don't go to those nasty sites", Lu said as she grabbed her coat. They both stood in silence for a moment and Lu said: "Why don't you come stay the weekend with me. Marc is at his dad's house till Monday and you can sleep in his room", Lu offered. "Alright I will", Erin said as she picked up her duffle bag once again and hoisted her back pack on her shoulder.

They both walked out of the hospital in silence, not knowing what more to say to each other. Lu drove off in her car and Erin staring out the window looking at the passing city lights. "Where do you live"? Erin asked. "Just a few miles down the road", Lu said as she turned down an alley way. "Kind of a scary looking place don't you think", Erin said looking around. "Nah, not really you get used to it after a while", Lu said as she parked the car. Lu got out and got Erin's stuff for her, and both of them walked up the hallway and into Lu's house.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

When they finally arrived at Lu's apartment, Lu had opened the door and said: "This is my place", Erin had walked in and started to look around. It was small, not what she was used to back in New York City., with her parent's penthouse apartment in the Trump Tower. "Nice place", She said as she sat down on a bar stool. "Do your parents know that you're here"? Lu asked as she opened up the fridge and got out two sodas. "Yes, I left them a note. Not that they would care or anything", she said as Lu handed her the soda. Erin opened it and sipped it a bit. "How old were you, when your parents told you that you were adopted"? Lu asked as she sat next to Erin. "They told me, when I was ten years old. But I kind of knew before then to", she said as she sat the drink down on the counter. "How did you know without them telling you?" Lu asked. "I knew when I was like five years old, when someone pointed out that I didn't look like neither of my parents. It was sure a devastating blow to my self esteem", She said.

"I'm sorry to hear that. Now that you are here, I realized that I shouldn't have given you up for adoption. Marc, my son, had always asked me for another kid; but I didn't have a heart to tell him about what happened to me when I was 13 years old", Lu said, as she looked down in shame. "What did happen"? Erin asked as she looked at Lu. "I was raped by a family friend. It happened at a neighborhood function of all places." Lu said. "So, about a week after the incident occurred, I found out that I was pregnant with you", Lu said as she looked down and started to cry. "Wow, I'm surprised you didn't abort me like some women would have", Erin said. "I almost did, until a friend of mine told me that it was a little to late. Which was true because a month later, I went for a check up and heard your heartbeat on the monitor; and right then and there I knew I couldn't have aborted you", Lu said as she grabbed Erin's hand. Erin looked at Lu and said: "My goodness I don't know what to say". Then, all of a sudden Lu said: "I think you should go to bed now, Marc's room is just down the hall and to your right", Lu motioned her hand towards her son's room. "Oh, alright then", Erin said, as she gathered her duffle and backpack and started to walk her way toward Marc's room. Erin entered Marc's room and dropped her stuff on the floor next to his bed and looked around his room. His walls were blue and had toy airplanes hanging from the ceiling, and he had a few music posters of his favorite bands on the wall. _Not a bad room_, Erin thought as she got undressed and into her PJs. She took out her razor blade and sat on the edge of Marc's bed. She ran the blade across her arm and quickly dabbed the blood with some Kleenex that she had in her bag. She had done that a few more times and then sighed. _I feel much better now_, Erin thought and pulled the covers over her, turned off the light and had fallen asleep.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

Lu woke up to the light streaming into her room; she used the bathroom and got ready for work. After she was done getting ready for work, she went into Marc's room to see if Erin was still there, and indeed she found her still asleep. Lu, sat on the edge of the bed just staring at her daughter, in awe that she was actually here after 18 years of not knowing where she was. As she was looking at Erin she noticed that Erin had cut marks on her right arm. "Erin, what the hell is this", Lu asked as she grabbed Erin's arm. Sleepy Erin rolled on her back and said "What the hell do you care. It's my arm and my life", Erin said as she sat straight up in bed. "I care Erin. I love you I really do", Lu said as she touched Erin's hair. "If you love me like you say you do then you would have kept me instead of just tossing me aside". Lu reached for Erin's hand but Erin had pulled away. "I didn't toss you aside baby. I gave you to good people who loved you and that could provide for you". Erin looked quizzical at Lu and said: "They provided for me yes, but love it wasn't really there unless they were buying me off with something". Lu again tried to take Erin's hand and this time Erin didn't let go. "What do you mean hon"?

Erin sighed and said: "They were always gone; they also missed most of my birthdays. I figured that's how it was for most people until I went to an overnight with a friend and saw how her parents were treating her. Mine treated me like shit", she said as a tear trickled down her cheek. "I'm sure they didn't mean to treat you like that", Lu said trying to reassure her. "Yeah, well, at least you don't have cancer", Erin said. Lu's face turned to shock. "What you never mentioned having cancer", Lu's heart was pounding out of her chest. "Yes, I have cancer, Leukemia to be exact. Had it since I was 10 years old", Erin explained as she stood out of bed. "Well, cancer does run in my family", Lu said as she stood up to. Erin looked at Lu and said: "I'm real sorry I should have told you sooner". Lu walked over to Erin and said: "Yes you should have told me sooner. But I guess you had a reason as to why you kept it from me this long". "Yeah there is a reason. I need a bone marrow transplant".


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

"Oh wow cancer", Lu gasped. "Yeah I never thought I would have it but I do. It's never gone in remission at all", Erin said "I guess it wouldn't hurt me to see if I'm a match for you after all you are my daughter", Lu said as she held Erin in her arms. "Really you would do that for me?" Erin asked sounding surprised. "Yes, of course I'll do that for you. I've always had to tell my cancer patients that, but I never thought I would have to do this one day", Lu said. "Yeah well me neither. I'm going to go take a bath, I hope you don't mind", Erin said as she made her way to the bathroom. "No I don't mind", Lu said as she went to go sit on the couch. Erin turned on the bath water, took off her clothes, and sat on the toilet while she held a razorblade in her hand. _I can't believe I'm cutting again. I guess this stress is way more then I could handle_, she thought to herself as the blade cut across the skin of her arm. She dabbed the blood with some toilet paper and lay in the bathtub for an hour. After a while later she sat on the couch with Lu and laid her head on Lu's lap. "When can you go get tested"? Erin asked. Lu was stroking Erin's hair and said: "I'll make an appointment for Monday morning so I'll call now", Lu got the phone and dialed the oncology center at the RWCH. "Yes, hi this is Dr. Lu Delgado; I would like to get tested for a possible bone marrow match for my daughter Erin"? Lu asked. "We have an appointment for Monday at 8am", the receptionist said. "Yes that will do thanks", Lu said as she hung up the phone. "This is more then what I can handle", Erin said as she sat up. "What do you mean", Lu asked. "Cancer and the adoption was a huge mind blow for me. I might die Lu and I don't want to", Erin sat there and cried. "I can't take this any more. All of this crap from my parents, I couldn't take it if you had rejected me; and I'm glad you didn't or else I would literally killed myself", Erin said as she looked at Lu. "I never would have rejected you like most people. I'm here for you and always will be", Lu said as she stood up. "Come here and let me hug you", Lu said. They stood there a while and just hugged, and Erin cried until she had fallen asleep yet again.


End file.
